Sept 17, 2007 Back in Dallas 11:00pm

Good morning Lord, it is 5am! Whether I wake up crying or at peace. I just want to wake up with YOU!!!!

Recapping the week:

• God brought me to Nashville: His exact Timing!!! One month later and I would be in Uganda, 2 days earlier and I would be in Dallas alone.
• God placed me in the home of Michelle who took care of everything; from getting me to ER and making all the decisions, who called, emailed, she took care of it ALL. Plus she surrounded me me with love and God's perspective on all of this!
• I went to Baptist Hospital where the BEST Nero Surgeon in the country will operate on me next week. The hospital itself ministered to me, so positive, being Jesus to me. Best staff ever!!!
• Support around me: the Bent Tree people, friends have been amazing. Going above and beyond. If it was 3 months earlier I not have even known them.
• Michelle has an elevator. Okay, who HAS an elevator in their home? She didn't even know why she had one, until I had the seizure and needed it to get down 2 flights of stairs.
• Tammy came to Nashville just so I wouldn't be alone and to fly with me back to Dallas!
• Some friend from my Life Group is watching my dogs. He loves them and so willing to stay as long as I need him.

HUGE blatant signs of God Everywhere!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I feel that God has so ordained this entire situation - place - time - everything for me. And I believe I will come out 100% physically, but more importantly He is doing a work in my heart - in my faith - in my relationship with Him. What a gift that He would pan out EVERYTHING for me. Kind of like a surprise party!!!

It's weird I was so tired when I went to bed last night, yet sleep doesn't come.

Today I read emails & got calls from friends from all over the US. many say what great faith I have. Yet, God you KNOW me, you know the really small faith I have had over the years. In the past I tried to convince myself that I was spiritual or had faith, but inside I know I am faithless.

But now God I feel like YOU have filled my heart with faith! To deny you working out all of this would be to deny your very existence.

Lord, I don't know what you have planned for me, but I KNOW whatever it is You will be glorified, You will be increased! Others will find faith in You!

Even as I read this, I am like, "who am I?" This is so not me! I'm not trying to be this way, it is just YOU in me!!! WOW!!!